Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
