you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
My Sexting was not on an AP level
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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