You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize
