I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Randomize
