even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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