there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
