one might say we're banned from that church
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
