Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
