I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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