By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
