Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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