When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
