i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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