stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
