What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
