But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Im just a social blackout drinker.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Panties = found
Randomize
