Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
