I got chris browned last night
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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