id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
