careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize