Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
