Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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