this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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