She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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