hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
