she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
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