When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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