I wish I could punch you in the face.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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