He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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