Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
you had me at cake vodka
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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