Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
