you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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