Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Randomize
