what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Farmville is her only friend.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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