i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
