My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
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