I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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