I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
