id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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