Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
