I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
