I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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