I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
