Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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