i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
