Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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