well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
