he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
