My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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