I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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