He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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